Swurve.com Review: Why Swurve.com Isn’t a Top Pick for Getting Laid



Review of



This site reeks of trying too hard. With a stupid site name and a layout from the 1990s, its efforts are clearly for naught. The adminstration makes zero effort to control scammers, thus allowing this site to become a singularly unsafe (and completely lame) use of your time.

Reviewed by

Swurve Expert

Have you ever been on a site that’s trying way too hard to be cool? That’s Swurve.com in spades. This site thinks that it’s ‘hip’ and with the ‘trends’, whatever that means. It’s just not good, and it’s just pathetic in all of its attempts to attract a younger crowd.

There’s nothing good or new about this site.

online hookup scam alert image

In fact, we’re pretty sure that Swurve.com needs a layout that isn’t from the 1990s. We’re also pretty sure that they need to stop posting up a ton of fake profiles that they use the old bait and switch tactic with, because seriously, that’s skeevy, and it’s just indicative of all the other Swurve scams that we saw during our Swurve review.

We also just hate the name.

What the hell is Swurve, anyway? We have no idea, but it just makes us want to grind our teeth for the most part, especially when we were reviewing this site and just had to keep typing it into the address bar every damned day. It’s awful, weird, and this whole site just sort of reeks of failure. It’s just not a good site, and it proved that time and time again for us.

overlay screencapture img Swurve.com

Our Three Month Test: The Results of Using Swurve.com

We ended up spending a total of three months on our sad, sad little Swurve review, and during that time, we sent out a total of 270 e-mails to women we seriously hoped weren’t just more Swurve scams.

The results were pathetic.

From those 270 e-mails, we only ended up with a pathetic total of 40 responses. That really was abysmally bad, and made us realize exactly how bad this site was overall. Seriously, it didn’t even come close to our 50% minimum, and that was very obvious.

We weren’t happy.

It didn’t get better either, considering we couldn’t get a single woman to ask us out. This means no hookups happened, and ultimately, that means this was all one big waste of time. Admittedly, we were expecting that, but still. This site was just not good at all.

Complete Analysis: Why Swurve.com Just Doesn’t Cut It

While there were a lot of things about Swurve.com that just set our teeth on edge, we were probably most annoyed by the fact that this site just took itself so seriously. We hate sites that do that when they’re honestly awful, and this site did that in spades.

It’s just not good.

The thing about this site is that it does nothing to control its population. This means that it doesn’t advertise, it posts fakes, and it just lets scammers run amuck. This is really not the kind of atmosphere that you want for hookups and online dating.

It’s not safe at all.

We literally can’t stand a site that just lets scammers run free, and on this site, that’s all you’re going to see in great amounts. We hate it, and we really wish that sites like this would end up torn down sooner rather than later. It just creates an awful, nervous environment, and that’s the sort of thing that we really aren’t interested in.

Swurve.com in the News

There are a lot of turn offs that guys have, and this article can help point them out in ways that Swurve.com simply can’t: http://voices.yahoo.com/the-top-ten-sexual-turn-offs-men-7850.html?cat=41

Knowing what birth control can do to her sex drive is important for you, so keep that in mind even when you’re on horrible sites like Swurve.com: http://voices.yahoo.com/what-oral-contraceptives-sex-drive-295547.html?cat=71

Our Final Call on How Swurve.com Measured Up

We ended up really hating Swurve.com, and that’s why we’d absolutely never recommend this as a site for anyone to actually use. It’s mostly just a joke to us, and we really think that you should avoid a site like this at all costs. It’s not safe, and it’s not going to get you laid.

Stop wasting your time.

A good alternative is our number one site, EstablishedMen.com. It’s the best of the best, considering that its numbers topped our charts. We really think that it’s going to be able to get you the results that you need, and you’ll be safe while it all happens. Check it out, and you’ll really be able to get the ladies that you want in your hookups.

20 Responses to “Swurve.com Review: Why Swurve.com Isn’t a Top Pick for Getting Laid”

  1. Galen Geyer

    My friend begged me to review Swurve.com for him, but I can’t tell if he was joking because this site is so bad.

  2. Small Volunteer

    I’m just laughing at how shitty this site is in comparison to the other ones I’ve seen out there. You keep trucking, shitty site.

  3. Cedrick

    I’m still worried that this site is a scam, but I think I’m going to join Swurve.com to see what it’s like.

  4. Jonah Fitzgerald

    I don’t know who told me that this site was legit, but that person was clearly lying because this is a joke.

  5. Springbok Steamy

    I try to find something good to say about everything, but there was literally nothing here that I liked at all.

  6. Eddie Quinn

    Test out Swurve.com if you want to, but my trial run of it was really disappointing and I think it’s a scam.

  7. Zonetone

    I don’t think that you can give sites a negative rating, which sucks because that’s exactly what this one deserves.

  8. Darell

    I read a review from 2013 saying that this site is really great, but from the homepage I don’t think that Swurve.com looks good.

  9. Felipe Sidower

    This site has convinced me that dating online is impossible, and I really don’t want to try it ever again.

  10. Crunchy Cute Jaguar

    Sites like this are the reason why I’m terrified of joining dating sites in general. There’s always a risk of it being a scam.

  11. Benedict Fisher

    If you read a review of Swurve.com that says it’s good, then know that it’s fake. The site paid people off to write reviews.

  12. Foxy Hammer

    I feel literally sick when I think about how awful this site is in comparison to other ones. I mean, what a hack.

  13. Abraham

    I really want to know for myself whether or not Swurve.com is a scam, because everyone says that it is.

  14. Simon Vanleer

    These kinds of sites should at least attempt to pretend that they’re legit, and not look so cheap like this one.

  15. Ronsoft

    I thought that this site was going to be good! Oh man, I was so disappointed once I joined and got this instead!

  16. Avery Lombardi

    There’s no way that I’m going to test out a hookup site ever again after my experience on Swurve.com! It was awful!

  17. Zoncom

    I wish I could give this site the rating it deserves, but since I can’t I’ll just write a really bad review.

  18. Claudio

    One review site from 2013 spent all their time harping on how great of a site Swurve.com was, so I have to join.

  19. Micah Shafer

    I’ve never tried dating online, but I don’t think that I’m going to now after trying to hook up on this site.

  20. The Tapir

    I can’t believe that sites like this even have any members. I mean, they look so fake that I would never join.


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